Daunted by the Proverbs 31 Woman

I used to read Proverbs 31 and think, "Am I meant to be all that?" I measured myself according to the standard she upheld. The Proverbs 31 woman. Capable, industrious, sacrificial, wise and well loved by all. I'm hardly any of those things. But I've been missing the point.

The Proverbs 31 woman is not a reminder of my smallness or what I must aspire to be for acceptance into God's kingdom. She was not superwoman. In fact, she was not any different to you and I, women of today.

The heart of the message is where she placed her focus; where she drew wisdom, strength and peace to be all she could be. The Proverbs 31 woman shows us that God makes all things possible when we find our security in Him. We may stare at our limitations but He sees potential - the seed He has placed in each of us. He has gifted us uniquely but for whatever the grand plan is, He provides the resources, equipping, enabling and empowering as we choose to embrace the adventure with Him.

Each of us has a specific life circumstance. Some of us are single students or career women; some of us are wives and maybe mothers. Some of us work full time; some work from home; some have casual jobs or volunteer; some are focused entirely on ministry. In these personal settings, we have different roles and responsibilities. So how does the Proverbs 31 woman 'model' apply to our individual lives?

The key is in being centred on God. From a place of intimacy with Him overflows insight, joy and hope. Balance is not about dividing ourselves equally amongst the different areas of our lives but knowing which one to prioritise for the season, and then pouring less into the others so that we're not over-stretching ourselves and are still effective for the kingdom. This is something I learnt from Priscilla Shirer. As we seek God to understand the time and season, we gain clarity and direction.

Others may not agree with where we are choosing to concentrate most of our efforts. It's like how some people look down on stay-at-home mums. But at the end of the day, it's about who we are in God and the area He knows is best to focus on for the time. Then, as seasons change, priorities shift. It isn't to say we then see our kids as less important as ministry or career, for example, but at that different stage we may not need to place as much time into the one area and can put more attention on another. When we are able to flow with God on this, all areas will come together well and the people in our lives will be happy.

Over-stretching ourselves can hurt those around us as we may end up flustered, stressed, disorganised, tired, grumpy, and the list goes on. But if we know where to centre ourselves and what to focus on, we are able to love others better (with all of us, not a small percentage).

We can live gloriously for God like the Proverbs 31 woman but our schedule need not look like hers. Looking only at her tasks and accomplishments may burden us but looking at the message behind her story will encourage, inspire and challenge us to the greatness we can attain individually because of God. She was faithful and fruitful with all she had on hand. We can be too with whatever we possess and wherever we have been placed. It's not about comparing or copying but being the best version of ourselves as God intended.

[This post is in honour of the unique 'Proverbs 31' women in my life - my grandmother (who went to celebrate her 96th birthday with Jesus), mum and sister, Belle, Charis, Chia Yen, Christine Chong, Kudzai Zvenyika, Mildred, Nicole, Serene, Shin Yee, Vanessa Chia and Zaida - thank you for being you and for your beautiful input into my life]